AXLDS Mexico 2007

I'm sitting alone at my kitchen table back in my little apartment in Madison, Wisconsin. My roomates are asleep and I have time to think. For the past two days I have been back in Racine after my 15 day long non stop adventure in Mexico. Extended family was in town and they all wanted to hear about my stories from the trip.

Oh Mexico. Where to begin i thought. Did they want to hear about the conference?

The conference.

Could i describe to them how i felt when I ate, lived, danced, talked and became friends with individuals from almost 20 different countries?

How about how suffocated I felt when I felt like I couldn't speak spanish. The one area in school I have felt passionate about and secure about was suddenly pulled out from under me. The panic I feltwhen I struggled through my sentences cringing at how choppy it sounded compared to the ease of the conversations floating around me. Breakfast, lunch, dinner, spanish spanish spanish... I finally was surrounded by the real thing and not 'classroom spanish' which was the onloy thing i had been exposed to for the past seven years... and i couldn't understand it. It was fast, there was slang, there was abbreviations, it was native, it was fast, i felt lost.

I couldn't describe the divide i felt inside of me of how disconnected i felt from the rest of the delegation in so many aspects but yet somehow how incredibly intertwinned I was with them. And how at one point i had tears rolling down my face because i felt i hadn't opened myself up enough at the conference and hadn't taken advantage of the situation i was in...and later had tears rolling down my face for just the opposite, saying good bye to the incredible people i had met and the friendships i had made.

Post conference...

Completeley different than the first week. Incredible by all means. A couple of days on the beach of the pacific in 8 huts with 30 @ers is bound to slide a few curve balls past you..fast forward to flight changes and unexpectedly jumping on a bus to Mexico City for four days sleeping on the couch of an @er you just met (yes i can say i have officially done what we claim so often in our info sessions) and spending some time getting to know the biggest city in the world.

Mexico City, D.F.

This city was so different than anything I've ever seen. The subway, the pyramids, the people, the food, the buildings, the houses, the streets, the smells, the nightlife, the traffic, the police... It was experience thats for sure. I can't say I fell in love with the city- but there's something about it that's lingering with me.

I'm home.

Now what? For one, I feel like someone pulled the curtains back on a window people my age never get to see. AIESEC aside, i can't say I know anyone who has friends spanning the globe. Real friends, Friends you feel comfortable enought to call up and tell them what's on your mind. Even in AIESEC, how many people in an LC have the opportunity, or seize the chance to see what I did and experience it in their own way...not enough.

I wish i could post pictures for everyone..but after a slow and painful death,(camera lost, camera found, screen break, shutter break, 200 picutres deleted) i have no visuals of my extended spring break 07.

After everything i've felt, and all the stories coming back to me, and all the people i'm missing so much while putting together this post, it's a fitting way to go to sleep and letting go for the evening, with a random one line gmail chat from a new friend in Colombia:I'm going to sleep

Luv u

Bye